“Don’t be a hard rock when you really are a gem…” the lyrics from Doo Wop (That Thing) circa 1999 by Lauryn Hill.
I’ve heard the song at least, a million times, but today I LISTENED and HEARD the lyrics! The song hit hard because I have been searching for avenues to translate that same message of respect to my pre-teen daughter. As a mother, I like to believe that I have been a great example for her to learn from but now I’m in competition with at least ten other know-it-alls, aka- “Friends”. As much as we want to help navigate and foster independence and a healthy self-esteem, we must first to start with the self. Getting to know the self is a continuous, life-long journey. I stress a focus on the self because I am guilty of not always feeling so great about myself or the situations I have allowed to create chaos in my life. As I listened to That Thing, I not only thought about myself but all the other women out there Lauryn Hill described and couldn’t help, but wonder what is it going to take for the message to sink in? I know a young lady who’s been dating this guy and he has done nothing but bring her down mentally and financially. Unfortunately, she is not the only one in that particular situation. Of course, we have our friends who try to tell us our value and worth but we still misinterpret the evidence and believe that concocted story in our minds, “He’s going to change” or “He loves me or he wouldn’t stick around”. The only change that needs to take place is the direction of your "compass of self-esteem". When will we allow ourselves to be treated like a gem and not a hard rock? How many crashes against the brick wall?
The great thing is, realizing the problem and formulating a solution and allowing the solution to play out in your life. Overall, I have landed on my feet and I only hope that my daughter learns from my successes as well as my failures. Hopefully, before some of us became parents, we had some clue as to where we were headed, or at least, somewhat close to our personal goals. If not, all is not lost and hopefully you are okay with making minor adjustments (an understatement in the world of parenting).
We owe it to all girls to represent ourselves as true gems!
Go and be Gem-nastic!
No comments:
Post a Comment