Fun and Flabulous!

Day in and day out, women, young, middle-aged and very mature complain about the villain of all villains: Arm flab. So many cute blouses and elegant dresses are being neglected due to arm flab. Arm flab is affecting a lot of women in our communities and it should be rectified immediately!

Solution: Stop whining! Unless you plan on working out, get over it! No one ever notices the flab until you so kindly jiggled it and gave it life! Your friends, family and coworkers all have it too! Embrace your flab and wear that sexy dress like you've never met flab before! Work that runway and enjoy the compliments as you strut with confidence! Thank your flab for always being there with you; dependable flab!

Go and be Flabulous!

RELAX RELATE RELEASE

Relax, Relate, Release!  Some of you may recall that phrase from a popular 90’s television sitcom called, A Different World. Television sitcoms are rarely a source of vital information, however the phrase, “relax, relate, release” is very applicable. The phrase not only puts a smile on my face but it also brings me back to the essence of me. Relax, relate, release, is synonymous to “wooosaaaw”. Both phrases are intended to calm the mind, body, and spirit. In order for you to feel this sense of rejuvenation, you need to focus completely and mean what you say. Whether, you are the “woooosaw” or “relax, relate, release” type, focus is important. 


Let’s begin with a simple definition of each term: Encarta Online Dictionary:

Relax: To become or make somebody less anxious, hostile, defensive. (Get it together)

Relate: To understand and respond favorably to something, or feel that it has a personal meaning or relevance. (Self-examination)

Release: The removal of something that makes somebody feel trapped, restricted, or burdened. (Let it Go, Part Ways, Give it Up, Move On, Get to Steppin’)

For me, the process usually goes something like this…First, I relax with a deep breath; get a hold of myself usually telling myself to “be quiet, don’t react” until I am 100% clear on the information or situation before me. Next, I “relate” the information/situation and attempt to understand and process the situation. Lastly, I attempt to let it go. My attempt to letting it go arrives after I have mentally brainstormed a solution/resolution that I am comfortable with, and that’s when I let it go! As you can see, I still need to work on the last phase. Great news, I am aware of what I can fix versus what I can’t control. And that my friend is a step in a positive direction for good mental health:)  

            

What formula, phrase, quote or process would you like to share? Whether you are applying it or not, please shareJ Remember, sharing is caring J

A Bunch of "Mess"

When you've been treated like a hard rock over and over again, you tend to carry with you, a bunch of "mess". The mess in each of our lives varies, but we all have some "mess" to deal with. Mess is good to have because it keeps you on your toes (certain types of "mess' that is). The key is how to clean up your "mess" and you definitely need to understand and recognize the "mess" when it appears. The “mess” will appear in many forms; from work issues, family issues, house cleaning or just life in general will sometimes morph into a gigantic ball of mess. Have you ever tried saying “mess” without shaking your head from side to side, along with a little eye rolling? So, my challenge, to you, the reader: Clean up the “mess” in your life and make room for happiness.


http://healing.about.com/od/forgive/a/forgivemeditate.htm

Hard Rock or a Gem?

“Don’t be a hard rock when you really are a gem…”  the lyrics from  Doo Wop (That Thing) circa 1999 by Lauryn Hill.

I’ve heard the song at least, a million times, but today I LISTENED and HEARD the lyrics! The song hit hard because I have been searching for avenues to translate that same message of respect to my pre-teen daughter. As a mother, I like to believe that I have been a great example for her to learn from but now I’m in competition with at least ten other know-it-alls, aka- “Friends”. As much as we want to help navigate and foster independence and a healthy self-esteem, we must first to start with the self. Getting to know the self is a continuous, life-long journey. I stress a focus on the self because I am guilty of not always feeling so great about myself or the situations I have allowed to create chaos in my life. As I listened to That Thing, I not only thought about myself but all the other women out there Lauryn Hill described and couldn’t help, but wonder what is it going to take for the message to sink in? I know a young lady who’s been dating this guy and he has done nothing but bring her down mentally and financially. Unfortunately, she is not the only one in that particular situation. Of course, we have our friends who try to tell us our value and worth but we still misinterpret the evidence and believe that concocted story in our minds, “He’s going to change” or “He loves me or he wouldn’t stick around”. The only change that needs to take place is the direction of your "compass of self-esteem". When will we allow ourselves to be treated like a gem and not a hard rock? How many crashes against the brick wall?

The great thing is, realizing the problem and formulating a solution and allowing the solution to play out in your life. Overall, I have landed on my feet and I only hope that my daughter learns from my successes as well as my failures. Hopefully, before some of us became parents, we had some clue as to where we were headed, or at least, somewhat close to our personal goals. If not, all is not lost and hopefully you are okay with making minor adjustments (an understatement in the world of parenting). 

We owe it to all girls to represent ourselves as true gems!

Go and be Gem-nastic!