Passion

Passion is that inner spark that ignites the moment you wake up and drives you to fulfill your purpose of living for that day. I have a lot of passions. I am passionate about life, goals and love. Passion is what makes me think I can save the world and I put forth every ounce of energy to fulfill that desire. I am even passionate about the passions of others and do what I can to help others fulfill their passions. I can’t think of a time when I didn’t have a passion. I firmly believe that without a passion you will be an unhappy individual. It saddens me when I meet someone who is passionless and I wonder how he or she goes about life. It is easy to lose or put a passion on the back burner. Sometimes life happens and we have to do what is needed to make a living. It is never too late to rediscover your passions. The sooner, the better!

What's your passion?

The Dash

What’s Your Story?

An email circulated a few years ago referring to the “dash”. The question was: What will your dash say about you? The “dash” represents your life’s journey from birth to death (b.1900-2000). I know this sounds morbid but it is an important and natural process each of us will be confronted with at some point in our lives. I remember attending a funeral on my daughter’s side of the family. I was so amazed by this woman’s life that I strived to be just like her. I had only met her a few times at various family functions and our conversations were casual. However, it was during her funeral service that I learned so much more about her life and what she meant to her children and to her community. I was so amazed at the love her children each had and the level of her community involvement. That is when the “dash” became something significant in my life. From that day forward I strived to be like my daughter’s great-grandmother and so much more. I was inspired by someone else’s “dash” and now, I wonder, how to give the “dash” more significance before the journey ends?

My daughter brought these questions to me last night, as she regretted not knowing her recently deceased grandmother very well. She would have liked one more conversation because she didn’t feel as though she knew enough about her grandmother’s life. Which brings me to my next question, how do we reconcile the generational gaps? The obvious solution is of course, better communication.

I would like to propose that each family begins to document something every year about their family and collect stories from the elders. The wisdom and life experience from our elders can go along way. I would include home remedies, funny stories, sad stories, births, deaths and accomplishments. I don’t believe you have to be famous or come from a world of wealth in order to share your family’s story. Every family and story is unique and deserves to be cherished before the “dash” ends. 

Pleasurable and Enlightening

I recently read Middlesex by Jeffrey Eugenides. Initial reactions to the title often imply the obvious sexual connotations. On the contrast, sex is the last thing the book focuses on. Middlesex depicts the journey of three generations of families of Greek descent. The book also illustrated historical moments that took place in the 1960s during Civil Rights Movement. The author utilized an omniscient narrator who is able to relay details of the lives of the characters in an objective manner. The intricacies of each love affair are questionable to the modern audience, however the author wove the details in a unique style that prevents the reader from being judgmental. Middlesex is a story every human can relate to because the story illustrates the human condition and the need to belong and feel included in our families and society. 

Gratitude

Sometime ago, I started keeping a gratitude journal. I decided to keep the journal because I was heavily into Oprah and she stated she was keeping one as well. I was also working with a family that suffered a traumatic accident and I had to stay positive to make it through the day. In addition to work, I had read sooooo many self-help books and each one had an underlying theme of gratefulness. So, long story short, I have a gratitude journal. Initially, I was journaling every night before going to bed. I slowly, got out of the discipline of journaling nightly. My journal is carried over year after year, which chronicles my sporadic attempts of tracking what I appreciate in life. I wouldn't say that I'm an ungrateful person and I would also not say that I haven't taken anything or anyone for granted. I would say, however, I do try to appreciate and try to control what is within my power. I understand that I may not like what the circumstances or situations reveal, but I know that nothing is always permanent and there is a lesson to learn and appreciate in all situations. I was told once by a wise and spiritual woman to "count it all joy". I didn't fully understand that statement twelve years ago until I got further on my journey of life. I not only found joy, but also found sorrow and strength. Strength helped me power through the storms too see the rainbow (joy) on the other side.

Through it all, I remained standing. Today, I am challenging myself each day to find something/someone that I am thankful for. Especially, when I am not happy or satisfied about something out of my control. Share your thoughts about gratitude or a story that may illustrate acts of thankfulness :) Sharing is caring!

RELAX RELATE RELEASE

Relax, Relate, Release!  Some of you may recall that phrase from a popular 90’s television sitcom called, A Different World. Television sitcoms are rarely a source of vital information, however the phrase, “relax, relate, release” is very applicable. The phrase not only puts a smile on my face but it also brings me back to the essence of me. Relax, relate, release, is synonymous to “wooosaaaw”. Both phrases are intended to calm the mind, body, and spirit. In order for you to feel this sense of rejuvenation, you need to focus completely and mean what you say. Whether, you are the “woooosaw” or “relax, relate, release” type, focus is important. 


Let’s begin with a simple definition of each term: Encarta Online Dictionary:

Relax: To become or make somebody less anxious, hostile, defensive. (Get it together)

Relate: To understand and respond favorably to something, or feel that it has a personal meaning or relevance. (Self-examination)

Release: The removal of something that makes somebody feel trapped, restricted, or burdened. (Let it Go, Part Ways, Give it Up, Move On, Get to Steppin’)

For me, the process usually goes something like this…First, I relax with a deep breath; get a hold of myself usually telling myself to “be quiet, don’t react” until I am 100% clear on the information or situation before me. Next, I “relate” the information/situation and attempt to understand and process the situation. Lastly, I attempt to let it go. My attempt to letting it go arrives after I have mentally brainstormed a solution/resolution that I am comfortable with, and that’s when I let it go! As you can see, I still need to work on the last phase. Great news, I am aware of what I can fix versus what I can’t control. And that my friend is a step in a positive direction for good mental health:)  

            

What formula, phrase, quote or process would you like to share? Whether you are applying it or not, please shareJ Remember, sharing is caring J

A Bunch of "Mess"

When you've been treated like a hard rock over and over again, you tend to carry with you, a bunch of "mess". The mess in each of our lives varies, but we all have some "mess" to deal with. Mess is good to have because it keeps you on your toes (certain types of "mess' that is). The key is how to clean up your "mess" and you definitely need to understand and recognize the "mess" when it appears. The “mess” will appear in many forms; from work issues, family issues, house cleaning or just life in general will sometimes morph into a gigantic ball of mess. Have you ever tried saying “mess” without shaking your head from side to side, along with a little eye rolling? So, my challenge, to you, the reader: Clean up the “mess” in your life and make room for happiness.


http://healing.about.com/od/forgive/a/forgivemeditate.htm

Hard Rock or a Gem?

“Don’t be a hard rock when you really are a gem…”  the lyrics from  Doo Wop (That Thing) circa 1999 by Lauryn Hill.

I’ve heard the song at least, a million times, but today I LISTENED and HEARD the lyrics! The song hit hard because I have been searching for avenues to translate that same message of respect to my pre-teen daughter. As a mother, I like to believe that I have been a great example for her to learn from but now I’m in competition with at least ten other know-it-alls, aka- “Friends”. As much as we want to help navigate and foster independence and a healthy self-esteem, we must first to start with the self. Getting to know the self is a continuous, life-long journey. I stress a focus on the self because I am guilty of not always feeling so great about myself or the situations I have allowed to create chaos in my life. As I listened to That Thing, I not only thought about myself but all the other women out there Lauryn Hill described and couldn’t help, but wonder what is it going to take for the message to sink in? I know a young lady who’s been dating this guy and he has done nothing but bring her down mentally and financially. Unfortunately, she is not the only one in that particular situation. Of course, we have our friends who try to tell us our value and worth but we still misinterpret the evidence and believe that concocted story in our minds, “He’s going to change” or “He loves me or he wouldn’t stick around”. The only change that needs to take place is the direction of your "compass of self-esteem". When will we allow ourselves to be treated like a gem and not a hard rock? How many crashes against the brick wall?

The great thing is, realizing the problem and formulating a solution and allowing the solution to play out in your life. Overall, I have landed on my feet and I only hope that my daughter learns from my successes as well as my failures. Hopefully, before some of us became parents, we had some clue as to where we were headed, or at least, somewhat close to our personal goals. If not, all is not lost and hopefully you are okay with making minor adjustments (an understatement in the world of parenting). 

We owe it to all girls to represent ourselves as true gems!

Go and be Gem-nastic!